Was 'Naked Gun' Best Baseball Movie Ever?

PLUS: OVERLOOKING OZZIE ALBIES WAS SERIOUS ERROR BY 'THE SHREDDER'

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Pregame Pepper

Did you know…

The Chicago White Sox are the latest team to seek a new park, with a South Side tract called ‘The 78’ targeted as the site for a stadium to succeed the poorly-named U.S. Cellular Park (most recently called Guaranteed Rate Field), operating since 1991 . . .

Congratulations to rising front-office star Kevin Ibach, promoted to assistant general manager and vice president of baseball operations at age 45 by the Tampa Bay Rays . . .

The Houston Astros will miss key set-up man Kendall Graveman, out for the season after shoulder surgery . . .

Instead of considering high-priced designated hitters Joc Pederson and J.D. Martinez, the Toronto Blue Jays would be wise to sign Phil Nevin’s son Tyler, a jack-of-all-trades coming off a .326 campaign in AAA . . .

At four years and $32 million, the Jays overpaid for Cuban pitcher Yariel Rodriguez, now the last man in a rotation that already includes Kevin Gausman, Chris Bassitt, Jose Berrios, and Yusei Kikuchi.

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Leading Off

A Mariners-Angels Game at Dodger Stadium? Answers to Your Baseball Related Questions in "The Naked Gun"

By Paul M. Banks

Dodger Stadium is the closest Major League ballpark to Hollywood and thus appears regularly in television and film. In the very first "Naked Gun" film, The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!, Chavez Ravine back-dropped the pivotal third act.

Spoiler alert: The film climaxes with a plot to assassinate the Queen of England being foiled by a bumbling police detective who goes undercover as an opera singer, and then as a home plate umpire. It's all set against the California Angels hosting the Seattle Mariners in the midst of a pennant race. Obviously, there has never been an actual Angels-Mariners game played at Dodger Stadium.

We can also safely say that baseball has never seen: a shortstop get hit by a moving car while in play on the diamond, a base runner mauled by a tiger at second base or an outfielder decapitated by a fly ball.

Let's answer some of the questions you may have about one of the best sports comedy sequences ever.

What is the overall legacy of this movie?

People are still writing about it closer to 40 years after it came out. In 2018, the L.A. Times called the conclusion of the "Naked Gun" the best baseball scene in movie history. In 2003, the New York Times labeled it one of the best 1,000 movies ever made.

Why Seattle Mariners vs. California Angels?

Filmmakers David Zucker, Jerry Zucker and Jim Abrams are all Wisconsinites who had hoped to use their home state Milwaukee Brewers, an American League team at the time. Major League Baseball said no, and told them they must take the Mariners. Why the M's? Prior to the arrival of Ken Griffey Jr. in 1989, they were toiling in obscurity, having never accomplished anything, ever and simply needed whatever exposure they could get.

As for the Angels, they actually played at Chavez Ravine for three seasons while their home, now known as Angel Stadium, was being built.

Why aren't the Dodgers in it?

A club spokesman told the Sporting News in 2018 that the team didn’t want to take part due to the on-field brawl scene in the film. They were happy to rent out the stadium for filming, but wanted no brand mentions. A bit overconservative, to say the least.

Any real-life ball players in the movie?

For the Mariners, only Jay Johnstone, who appears as himself. But ironically, Seattle is not one of the eight teams for which he actually played. He was three years retired when this film was released in 1988, with his final team being the Dodgers. Interestingly enough, his first team was the Angels, and thus the circle of life was completed here.

Reggie Jackson, portraying a character inspired by the Manchurian Candidate, is the only real-life Angel, but he had retired by then. He has just one line of dialogue, which he repeats: "I must kill the queen." In his playing career, Jackson hit 563 career home runs, made 14 All-Star Game appearances, but, thankfully, made no attempts to commit regicide. And yes, we did actually use the term "regicide" correctly.

Who portrays the other ball players?

The nearby San Bernadino Spirit (now known as the Inland Empire 66ers), a Mariners affiliate for which Griffey once played, provided a majority of the stand-ins. Joey Banks, son of "Mr. Cub" Ernie Banks, served as a baseball advisor to the film. In a twist on real life, controversial umpire "Cowboy" Joe West appears in the film and gets tossed from the game by the main character, Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen).

A seven-person movie broadcast booth ("How about that?!") was used, with Curt Gowdy, Jim Palmer, Tim McCarver, Mel Allen, Dick Enberg, Dick Vitale and Dr. Joyce Brothers appearing as themselves. This was actually rather prescient in regards to the media industry.

Does the Big A make an appearance?

Yes, there is an Angel Stadium establishment shot, but confusingly, it follows stock footage of Wrigley Field in Chicago. (It's a slapstick comedy since much of what occurs is intentionally non-sensical) No attempt is made to disguise Dodger Stadium, its uniquely-shaped scoreboard and trademark mountain vistas.

Paul M. Banks is the owner/manager of The Sports Bank. He’s also the author of “Transatlantic Passage: How the English Premier League Redefined Soccer in America,” and “No, I Can’t Get You Free Tickets: Lessons Learned From a Life in the Sports Media Industry.” See also https://www.thesportsbank.net/ 

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Cleaning Up

‘Shredder’ Strikes Out In Rating Second Basemen

By Dan Schlossberg

Generously listed at 5’8” on Atlanta’s 40-man roster, Ozzie Albies stands considerably taller in the eyes of his colleagues.

Only The Shredder, which provides off-season Top Tens for Brian Kenny at MLB Network, thinks differently.

In a segment called Top Ten Second Basemen Right Now, The Wizard of Ozzies magically disappeared — or was never considered in the first place.

To fill time during the long off-season, MLB Network airs movies, repeats the 10-part Ken Burns ‘Baseball’ series, and tries to convince advertisers to spend their dollars on announcers addressing trade rumors — and other player moves that probably won’t happen.

In addition, Bryan Kenny and other analytics-oriented announcers stage regular ratings of players by position — comparing their ratings with algorithms produced by a computer nicknamed “The Shredder.”

Often, the humans do a better job.

Take their “Top Ten Right Now” segment on second basemen.

Albies is missing — even though players like Zack Gelof, Andres Giminez, and Matt McLain made the list.

From this perspective, it seems The Shredder shredded its own information.

A three-time All-Star with two Silver Sluggers and a World Series ring, Albies may not be as valuable as Mookie Betts, who is moving to second base with the Dodgers this season, or three-time batting champ Jose Altuve, another little leadoff man with surprising pop. But he might rank as high as fourth on the Top Ten, ahead of go-hit, no-field Luis Arraez, who has back-to-back batting crowns in opposite leagues.

In two of the last three seasons, Albies topped 30 home runs and 100 runs batted in.

How many second basemen do that?

Albies even ranked 10th in the National League with a slugging average of .513. No other second baseman even made the list [Betts spent most of 2023 as an outfielder].

He was sixth in total bases, at 306, ahead of Ketel Marte and all others who cavorted around the keystone in 2023. Again, Betts was an outfielder last year who merely filled in as a middle infielder according to team need.

A fleet switch-hitter from Curacao, Albies occupies the No. 2 spot in the Atlanta lineup between bosom buddy Ronald Acuna, Jr. and slugger Matt Riley. He couldn’t be sandwiched between better people — a fact borne out last season when all three of them, plus cleanup man Matt Olson, made the All-Star team.

Albies, who turned 27 this month, weighs 165 pounds dripping wet. A little guy with a big bat and a bigger smile — apparently a trait of players from Curacao if Andruw Jones is a great example.

His smile would be even wider if voters and shredders appreciated him more.

After the snub, one of the Atlanta media corps that covers the Braves Tweeted, “Did Ozzie Albies Retire?”

If he did, it’s news to the Braves.

Former AP sportswriter Dan Schlossberg of Fair Lawn, NJ covers the game for forbes.com, Memories & Dreams, USA TODAY Sports Weekly, Sports Collectors Digest, and many other outlets. E.mail him via ballauthor@gmail.com.

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Timeless Trivia

“I'm just putting a good swing on the ball."

— Mike Cameron to Seattle teammates during his four-homer game on May 5, 2010

Just to prove how random a feat it is, only six of the players who hit four home runs in one game are in the Hall of Fame [Lou Gehrig, Gil Hodges, Ed Delahanty, Willie Mays, Chuck Klein, and Mike Schmidt] . . .

Green Monster or not, nobody from the Boston Red Sox has ever done it . . .

Bob Horner (Braves) and Ed Delahanty (Phillies) did it in losing causes . . .

Gehrig was the first American Leaguer to do it, in 1932, but nobody from the AL had a four-homer game during the 43-year span from 1959-2002 . . .

Mike Cameron knocked in only four runs when he did because no one was on base . . .

Klein, Schmidt, and Pat Seerey required 10 innings to produce a four-homer game . . .

Gehrig was not only the first AL player to do it but the only Yankee.

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Know Your Editors

HERE’S THE PITCH is published daily except Sundays and holidays. Benjamin Chase [gopherben@gmail.com] handles Monday and Tuesday editions, Elizabeth Muratore [nymfan97@gmail.com] does Wednesday and Thursday, and Dan Schlossberg [ballauthor@gmail.com] edits the weekend editions on Friday and Saturday. Readers are encouraged to contribute comments, articles, and letters to the editor. HTP reserves the right to edit for brevity, clarity, and good taste.

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